|
|
The Crystallized Liquid
To my Lover… When we are apart, time can be so cruel, it will not let me stay young, nor will it let me live in a youthful body forever… Yet, I love you so much and see the years we have been apart. Like ice picks from hell, my soul shudders at the separation. It is a time to regroup, realize, and remember. I am not for want. In my wildest dreams, I could have had no more finer experience than the nights I spent with you. When we held eachother in desperation and delight! I can smell your scent~ even after all this time, I can see you eyes and face and everything you physically demand, and I can feel your touch on my lips, and the soothing sensations you brought. You were kind to me and made me feel accepted. No one can know how much I love you for that. I was weak and sad, I was hard and bad, and I was lost to understanding what it means to Love. You brought out that part in me that was always yelling to be free, but I was too scared to take a chance. I wanted to play it safe and not rush things. You were untested, and I had been used in the past. I was not going to give my heart freely; you had to pay a price. How happy I am you paid and more! You gave me your trust and honesty; as well as, Respect. Why do I fool myself about how you make me feel? How I wish the universe would restart, and we would have fallen in love at childhood. Where you could be my best friend all the time, and we could challenge the world! I miss you often, but I keep it to myself. I do not want you to go getting any wild ideas just because we have held eachother in the night, and walk hand in hand in the day. I am here, and you are there’ and this is the injustice of life! Will you come back to me, or will you abandon me like everyone else I put my faith into? I wish I did not feel fear, But I do not fear for me, I fear for you because you care about me… No ones ever really cared about me enough to give me time and space. That is a very rare quality in someone, and I found that quality in you. You will not know how I cry in the night wanting you to hold me, and comfort my mind in this harsh and unyielding world. I cannot see you when you are so far away, and I worry my mind will play tricks on me and make me forget… It is in this home I sit after many years. I have made friends with Joe and sally, but I have not forgot you. You were my everything, and I was never as happy as I was in those days when we could be together around the clock. I am old now, why do I still morn the loss of your presence? That is always a stupid question. I love you, and I will not allow myself to disregard how much you mean to me. If only this prayer could find you out there, I would know you are still close. I hear a knocking at the door, I turn and I open the door. If I show you these emotions one more time, will you hold me tonight? I embrace death and reach for your hand. How could I doubt you would not find me? Please take me into this new world and promise me you will never go away again…
Thomas A Sutor P O Box 2343 Lompoc CA 93438 Rockhawk.com |
All written word is "The Opinion" of Thomas A. unless otherwise noted...
|
