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Does She know who I am?
She might see things very different from me, but does she want more out of life and romance? I tell her my needs, and I tell her my dreams, yet she only lets them float past her emotions. I could use a little encouragement, I could use a little support, but I only get silence. That unforgiving nothingness that tells me I am not important to her world. How should I think? I can not read her mind! I want us to forge ahead and focus on building a sound and secure future. One where we do not hesitate to talk things out and there is no punishment- only a continual development of love. My ideas of love have always been ones of working together` too reach a common goal; she has been hurt and now refuses to acknowledge the word. Why I continually seek comfort in her arms I do not know, yet when we are together we both are filled with great emotions of passion and pleasure. This is how it should be between soul mates. Sadly, she does not believe in soul mates, or was it that her past relations proved only how cruel and superficial` words really are? And even though words change form: day to day, my heart instinctively desires her. It is the madness of quite days and weeks that makes me doubt` there was anything but just fun times and playful sexual attraction. However, on the deeper levels of commitment, she retains the right to live alone. As if living with me' would only make things harder? How could having someone around to share your fears and rewards be a disadvantage` I do not know? With all the possible females on the planet, why do I fall into this hopeless romantic situation? Am I cursed from the day I was born? Too seek for something I will never attain? What type of justice is this! Here I cry, and here I become bitter. My emotions are not as easily turned off as the “A type” personality. How I wish I did not have to yearn or want or need! It would be great just to be a non thinking entity without emotional attachment. Then I could be happy alone. Ill fated, I turn to gain the courage to face another day~ without words from her... She enjoys her solitude and finds a way to live without me; I find a sinking ship’ destined to the bottom of the lost lovers fantasy. She thinks of me and does not comprehend` how easy it would have been to give words of encouragement. Her emotions are held safe inside firm walls while mine drain from my soul` in this watery grave.
Thomas A Sutor P O Box 2343 Lompoc CA 93438 Rockhawk.com |
All written word is "The Opinion" of Thomas A. unless otherwise noted...
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